SBC Stunned to Find No "Homecoming" in Bible

NASHVILLE, TN - TBNN has learned that Southern Baptist Convention (SBC) leaders are stunned by their recent findings. Lifeway, the research branch of the SBC, has concluded a six month study on what Southern Baptists refer to as "Homecoming." Homecoming is a special day in the life of most SBC churches, when former members are invited back "home" for fellowship.

The shocking result of the study? Homecoming is nowhere to be found in the bible.

Paige Patterson, president of Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, admitted, "We used Bibleworks to scour the KJV, NKJV, NIV, NASB, ESV, NLT, TNT and YLT. We didn't find the word 'Homecoming' anywhere. The closest thing we found was Jesus' parable about the prodigal son in Luke 15. The son did come home, but we have to admit that to apply that to our Homecoming celebrations would be to take the text a bit out of context."

"We also wanted to make Jesus' ascension into heaven like Homecoming, but some of the folks here just didn't feel right about it."

Patterson concluded, "In the NKJV, we did find the word 'home' 67 times. 'Coming' occurs a whopping 260 times. Unfortunately, we never found the two words together. This is very disappointing."

For those of you who are not Southern Baptist, a little explanation may be in order. Homecoming is supposed to be an annual Sunday when former members living in other places are invited back home to reunite with old friends. Unfortunately, that is not what really happens. Hardly anyone who has left for another church comes back, because they usually departed over a church split.

So what really happens on Homecoming? Thom Rainer, president of Lifeway, told TBNN, "Homecoming has become a day when most of our inactive church members come back to church. We have three high-attendance days every year: Christmas, Easter, and Homecoming. So while it looks like a lot of former members have come home on Homecoming, it's really just current members showing up who hardly ever do."

Homecoming is a very strong tradition in older SBC churches, especially in the South. Wallace Sikes, pastor of the First Baptist Church of Pine Bluff, Arkansas, said, "We know for a fact that half of Southern Baptists don't make it to church on Sunday. Well, we really miss the folks in our church who don't come. We want to see them more than on just Christmas and Easter. Homecoming gives us another chance to be with our friends. We just love it. Sometimes we even call it Inactive Member Sunday. We just want them to feel comfortable coming to church."

SBC leaders, convinced of the fact that the SBC is the most biblical denomination in the world, reportedly wanted to "spice up" Homecoming celebrations by finding a biblical warrant for them. Chuck Kelley, president of New Orleans seminary, reported to TBNN, "We knew that if we could find Homecoming in the bible, then our churches would rally around the celebration. No longer would it just be another high attendance Sunday."

In light of the Lifeway findings, what is the SBC to do? According to an SBC press release, "Although we at the SBC did not find any evidence of Homecoming in the bible, we still think it is an important tradition. So, while the bible is important, so is tradition. We encourage our churches to continue with their Homecoming celebrations. After all, the Homecoming offering is the third biggest of the year."